Social anxiety has a way of making even the simplest things feel impossible. It convinces me that everything I say is wrong, every pause in a conversation is awkward, everyone I talk to is silently judging me, and every mistake is somehow proof that I should’ve just stayed home.
I forgot to take my meds before making this video, and throughout it all my thoughts were racing, my heart was pounding, and I was just melting away inside. I couldn’t remember anything I’d planned to say and instead just talked. Raw, honest, and completely unscripted. I was so lost to the moment that I even put my serum on before my toner…IYKYK
I debated back and forth about recording that part again and editing it to have a “perfect” skincare routine. In the end, I left it in because that one little booboo explains social anxiety better than words ever could. It’s being flustered, and awkward, and shaky, and breathless…and courageous. Because it takes so much courage to walk out into a world your anxiety is constantly trying to convince you hates you.
Crowning My Courage – Social Anxiety – Entry One
I’m starting Crowning My Courage because I never want someone to believe they’re the only one whose brain tells them they’re too much, not enough, too awkward, too broken, or too afraid. I’ve lost so many years believing the lies my inner voice whispers. I’ve let it steal chances, friendships that might’ve been, and experiences that’ve been lost before they even began..
After fifteen years of therapy (and medication!) I’m choosing courage. I’m choosing to show up even when my stomach is roiling and my inner monologue won’t stop talking. And I’m choosing to share because I know I’m not the only one who’s ever felt this way and we all need a safe space where we’re not alone.
If you’re still trying to find the courage to be who you truly are, without social anxiety forcing you back into your bubble, I’m here…and I’ve got more than enough courage to go around. Our lives don’t need to revolve around fear. Anxiety and courage can be best friends who walk side by side on this journey. We survive, we strive, and sometimes, in the end, we even get to thrive but it’s harder to do alone.
Join the community, subscribe to my YouTube channel, and join me every Monday for another entry to Crowning My Courage, where TMI doesn’t exist.
Survive. Strive. Thrive.
From the scars on my arms to the crown on my head – turning a lifetime of trauma into service.
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